SACRAMENTO, CA—In an effort to abide by emergency conservation measures issued by the State Water Sources Management Board, golf programs in California have been pressured to make use of insulin to keep up their fairways and greens, sources confirmed Friday. “Sadly, the state’s restrictions on water utilization have left us with no alternative however to purchase up all of the accessible insulin and dump it on the grass,” stated Pebble Seashore CEO David Stivers, who added that regardless of the excessive price ticket, insulin was clear and principally liquid, making it a workable backup possibility for hydrating the 4 famend golf programs his firm operates on the Monterey Peninsula. “We all know there are some secondary medical makes use of for the substance and that it’s in excessive demand. However it’s crucial that one thing goes into our sprinkler system and water options, so it should do. As different programs have discovered themselves in the identical state of affairs, we’ve needed to buy each ounce of the stuff on the world market to insure our golfers can tee off, with out interruption, for years to return. We’re all making sacrifices right here to assist relieve the water scarcity, so diabetics will merely need to study to go with out.” At press time, Stivers introduced that his golf programs would even be replenishing their sand traps with 60,000 tons of powdered child system.