Unfavourable feelings are like a wedgie.

They’re uncomfortable and one thing we normally need to repair immediately. 

Typically folks handle their destructive emotions by way of a course of referred to as intellectualization. Let’s discover what intellectualization and the way it can have an effect on the best way you course of feelings and get better from challenges.

Disclaimer: This data will not be an alternative choice to the skilled opinion of a licensed psychologist, psychiatrist or medical physician.

What’s Intellectualization?

In psychology, intellectualization refers to a protection mechanism whereby a person turns into excessively depending on logic as a technique to keep away from having to confront distressing feelings.

In different phrases, it’s once we use logic to flee uncomfortable feelings like unhappiness, disappointment and anger.

Intellectualization is a type of dissociation as a result of it includes separating oneself from the issue at hand and taking a pseudo-objective viewpoint.

The method of intellectualization has been described as a “flight into motive” as a result of an individual who intellectualizes their emotions runs away from their emotions, beneath the guise of rationality.

An individual will normally flip to intellectualization as a coping mechanism as a result of it permits them to distance themselves from beliefs that problem their sense of self.

What does intellectualization seem like in apply?

An individual who’s intellectualizing their emotions could also be fast to make statements equivalent to “It is not a giant deal”, “I will recover from it” or “I am being too emotional“, simply moments after experiencing an emotionally distressing occasion equivalent to a breakup or loss.

Such behaviour is intellectualization as a result of it’s an try and defy the traditional emotional reactions that invariably observe these experiences.

Listed here are a pair extra examples of intellectualization: 

• An individual who focuses all their vitality on funeral preparations as a technique to keep away from confronting the ache and grief of dropping their partner.

• An individual who begins both working additional time or overextending themselves socially after a breakup, as a technique to keep away from time spent alone with their ideas, so they do not need to course of the top of the connection.

• An individual who’s recognized with a persistent illness spends an extreme period of time studying books, watching informational movies, and making an attempt to determine all of the intricate particulars of their situation as a method to keep away from coming to phrases with how the analysis makes them really feel.

Why Intellectualization is Harmful

People are delicate, delicate creatures.

Our unbelievable capability to acknowledge and really feel feelings is a key trait that distinguishes us from different residing creatures. 

Intellectualization is harmful as a result of it turns a human into an automaton.

And the factor is: we weren’t designed to be automatons.

We weren’t created with an “off change” for our feelings.

Feelings demand to be felt, and in case you attempt to push them away with logic, these feelings do not really disappear. 

They only develop and fester inside you, till they’re so highly effective that they burst forth in methods you can not management.

Take for instance, the sensation of despair.

Here’s a quote by Carl Jung, the Swiss psychiatrist who is called the daddy of analytical psychology.

It occurs to be one in every of my favorite quotes:

“Melancholy is sort of a lady in black. If she turns up, do not shoo her away. Invite her in, provide her a seat, deal with her like a visitor, and take heed to what she has to say.”

When confronted with a tough emotion equivalent to despair, you can not remedy it by way of intellectualization. 

You in all probability can relate to this deeply in case you ever have been in a depressive temper and had somebody say to you: “Cheer up! You should not be depressed! Your life is nice.”

Certain, in concept, your life could also be nice.

You’ll have the job, the home, the connection – all the things could look excellent on the skin. 

However you should still be depressed…and that is allowed.

If destructive emotions come up, you do not have to scold your self for feeling unhappy, regardless of all the things. 

You’re allowed to really feel. 

You’re allowed to take a seat with these feelings with out rationalizing them away. 

Fairly often, the solely means out of inauspicious durations of our lives is by way of. Meaning sitting with disagreeable feelings and listening to what they’ve to show us. 

As a result of there may be at all times one thing you may be taught in case you give your self a second for introspection and reflection.

The Distinction Between Intellectualization and Emotional Regulation

Now, let’s make it clear: there is a distinction between intellectualization and emotional regulation. 

Simply because you’ve the capability to really feel your complete gamut of human feelings, it does not imply that it’s important to act on each emotion you’re feeling. 

Whereas intellectualization includes avoidance and dissociation from destructive feelings, emotional regulation includes the conscious acknowledgment and integration of destructive feelings as a part of a wholesome and totally developed sense of self.

You may pay attention to, and settle for your feelings with out giving them free rein in your actions.

The vital factor is to acknowledge your feelings with out making an attempt to repress them or feeling disgrace that you just really feel the best way you do. 

Remaining Ideas

It may be tremendous to place off an emotional burden for a time frame – in truth fashionable life typically necessitates it. 

For instance it’s possible you’ll delay reflecting on a painful occasion that occurred yesterday if it’s important to put together for a remaining examination tomorrow.

It may also be helpful to typically consider issues in summary, logical phrases to keep away from making impulsive, emotion-driven choices. 

Nonetheless, stability is required.

If feelings are by no means addressed – they’ll construct up additional time and develop into a giant ugly monster that later bites us within the bottom. 

So it pays to decide on the route that brings us better peace of thoughts in the long run: Tonight we’d forgo sleep – crying and screaming into our pillow over an emotionally distressing state of affairs – however it might be simply what we have to have a sound, peaceable sleep tomorrow.

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