TALLAHASSEE—Calling the transfer “essential” for the wellbeing of the state’s youngsters, Florida unveiled a brand new college curriculum Monday that will require college students to maintain their eyes shut all day till they had been protected at dwelling. “Beginning at this time, all 2.8 million college students in Florida can be required to maintain their eyes closed for everything of the varsity day to guard them from groomers, the woke thoughts virus, and significant race principle,” mentioned Florida’s training chief Manny Diaz Jr., including that college students should cowl their eyes and ears in addition to their mouths after they first enter colleges doorways till they’re led out by their lecturers to the parking zone and picked up by their mother and father. “Beginning at 8 a.m., all Florida college students can be led right into a darkish room, be blindfolded, be given a pair of noise-cancelling headphones, and have a sock stuffed of their mouths whereas all courses, together with English, math, science, and historical past, are taught. And if they don’t, lecturers can be ordered to promptly gouge their college students’ eyes out. No exceptions.” At press time, Diaz added that every one lecturers would quickly be required to have their lips sewn shut and be chemically castrated earlier than they may legally work together with college students.