ANCHORAGE, AK—Stating that she had heard each views and will perceive their frustrations, marriage counselor Laurie Hartford reportedly informed couple David and Julia Carter that she in the end needed to aspect with the warmer partner. “So, I’ve listened to all the pieces you’ve needed to say, and I’ve come to the conclusion that whereas David does appear to be emotionally withholding, he’s additionally a minimum of two factors hotter,” mentioned the therapist, who rushed to notice that, in all equity, she wanted to take into accounts that she would at finest describe the feminine half of the connection “as, like, a six even on her finest day.” “I’ve spent hours listening to you pour out your hearts and that’s by no means straightforward, so pat yourselves on the again. However, frankly, solely certainly one of you has bothered to comb your hair or placed on a pleasant shirt at these classes. I’m not in any approach attempting to invalidate your experiences. All I’m saying is that solely certainly one of you—David—has an ass that you might bounce 1 / 4 off, and the opposite one is sort of an uggo, if that is smart?” Hartford went on to say that it is perhaps useful if Julia stayed at house for his or her subsequent classes in order that they might spend extra time understanding the place, precisely, David’s hotness got here from.